Tips for Caregivers to Maintain Good Mental Health
Caregivers’ mental health matters. As baby boomers age, more of their daily care is being provided by informal caregivers, often who are family members. About 1 in 3 adults in the United States alone provides care to other adults, in fact. Oftentimes though, these people don’t necessarily recognize they are a caregiver. It is a role that can become burdensome, isolating, and confusing. Anyone who is helping another person in need, whether it be an aging relative, a disabled person, or a sick partner, is a caregiver.
Being an informal caregiver comes with unique challenges. Qualicare’s home health care and senior care franchise partners are privileged to work with many of these caring people. As World Mental Health Day was celebrated on October 10, we are taking the opportunity to explore the experience of being an informal caregiver, and how to know when to ask for additional support.
Informal caregiving is both stressful and enriching
Many people find caring for others to be a necessary, and expected role, and enjoy helping out their families and others in need. Women in particular are expected by society to fill in when a loved one needs extra help. Caregiving is a value that many people hold, and it is a positive and needed aspect of society.
However, any new unexpected changes in roles for family members and friends require time and support to emotionally process. The additional work of caregiving causes both physical and mental stress. Oftentimes, informal caregivers will feel exhausted, angry, depressed, and alone. And it is very common for informal caregivers to experience anxiety and stress about their added workload.
Informal caregivers oftentimes engage in work that other people do as their full-time employment. Cooking, running errands, house cleaning, taking care of someone else’s physical needs, and becoming emotionally enmeshed with someone who is in need, are in fact ways that formal, employed caregivers make a living.
It is important to point this out, because oftentimes, informal caregivers are also working a formal job, and don’t realize how much their informal work is impacting their day-to-day life. Women, especially lower-income women, who live with the person they take care of, are especially at risk of caregiver stress, and burnout due to the work.
The emotional labor of an informal caregiver
The website Very Well Mind’s article “What Is Emotional Labor?” defines emotional labor as “The unspoken expectation that in a nuclear family unit, it is the woman’s job to do everything from care for children to manage finances to acquire home supplies.” The expectation of conforming to other people’s expectations of what their role in society is, adds a tremendous burden to caregivers. Depending on one’s race/ethnicity and socioeconomic status, the burden of emotional labor fluctuates as well, depending on one’s status in a more marginalized, or more dominant social group.
The emotional labor of an informal caregiver could include putting their own needs to the side for the sake of taking care of family for an extended period of time, feeling obligated to do more than they are actually able, and feelings of stress and depression that come with being physically and mentally exhausted. It is more likely that an informal caregiver will experience stress if they spend many hours caregiving, if they don’t have extra money to spend on hired help, and if they do not have the emotional coping skills to deal with stress and life changes in a healthy way.
Signs it’s time to ask for help
The Mayo Clinic outlines “signs of caregiver stress” in this article. Oftentimes, caregivers are so focused on loved ones that their own health suffers. It’s vital to both the caregiver’s health and that of the person in need to watch for these signs:
- Becoming easily angry or irritated
- Fatigue
- Losing interest in hobbies and activities
- Frequent headaches, body pain, and other physical problems
- Feeling overwhelmed or worried constantly
- Ongoing depressive feelings that are related to caregiving
- Abusing drugs, prescription medications, and alcohol
- Gaining or losing weight
- Not getting enough sleep or sleeping too much
As we know, too much stress is extremely harmful to health. Stress wreaks havoc on the mind and body, as this Mayo Clinic article describes. So, if stress signs begin to appear due to informal caregiving, it may be time to ask for help. Assistance can come from community or family support, or from hiring a caregiver to help ease the workload.
Emotional well-being tips for caregivers
The best way to care for others is to be sure you’re caring for yourself. Here are a few tips for informal caregivers to maintain good mental health:
- Set goals that are realistic and attainable. Make lists, and complete tasks one at a time. Take breaks, breathe deep, and honestly assess how much energy you have for caregiving each day.
- Allow yourself to say “no.” It’s ok to not attend events that are draining or put work into things that are not necessary or rewarding.
- Accept help if offered. Be open to making lists of tasks for others. Let friends bring meals or take your loved one out in nature. Community support can be found in abundance if you’re open to it.
- Connect with people in similar situations. Often communities have caregiver resources or support groups for informal caregivers. It helps greatly for mental health to have one’s feelings validated by others. Therapy could be a good option for learning how to cope with life changes as well.
- Take great care of your physical health. If your body is not well, your mind won’t be well either. Take time to prioritize consuming healthy foods, give yourself time for physical activity, and drink lots of water.
- Get proper rest. Many caregivers do not get enough quality sleep, which greatly impacts their health over time.
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